From my journal (with minor edits) - Monday, August 14th, 2017
I am feeling a great sense of thankfulness that needs to be noted. For much of my life I have not been able to keep close friends for very long for a variety of reasons - people move away, loyalties change, expectations aren't met, we grow apart as we ourselves grow and change. It just seemed to happen an unnaturally large number of times in my life, and I have often felt like I was left on the outside of various circles of friends. I remember crying to my mom in high school or early college because once again my friend base had crumbled. She sympathized, and commented that it may be the trial I'm meant to have in life. It's been discouraging to have it happen even in adulthood, and it may happen again in the future.
Right now I'm surrounded with this incredible community of women that I can't help but be in awe of. Strong women from different backgrounds and life situations - all of whom are talented in their unique ways. These women are married, divorced, single, mothers, pet moms, newly pregnant, longing to be pregnant, some who never want children, working professionals, creative, quiet, loud, genuine. Healthy. Sick. Yet we've found a commonality that has brought us together.There is no adequate way to describe the impact they're having in my life. Together we laugh, struggle, cry, encourage, comfort, listen, share, support, and challenge our abilities. I'm witnessing all of us becoming better people because of the community we're developing. I'm watching bonds of trust being formed, and gently tested as we open ourselves up to each other. We lift each other. Sometimes literally.
I feel included, wanted, loved. Valued.
My heart is so full of love for these women it's overwhelming. Life is never free of struggles, but this is a time I hope will last - it makes the burdens and challenges easier to bear; just a snapshot of imperfect perfection in the midst chaos. I am grateful for the impact they're having on me and I am striving every day to be someone of value to them in return.